It is important to acknowledge that the subject of trauma is both complex and goes beyond the scope of a blog, however, the aim of this piece is to simplify and bring awareness to the pervasive and far-reaching nature of how trauma has infiltrated our community and our lives.
When thinking about what defines trauma, many conclude that trauma is what we refer to in the therapy world as ‘big T’ trauma. Put simply, examples of trauma that would come to mind under this banner include significant and often life-threatening events such as war, natural disasters, domestic violence, motor vehicle accidents, assault, and child abuse. However, whilst this most definitely constitutes a large portion of the work in the therapy room with clients, I wanted to focus this article on ‘Big T’s counterpart, ‘Little T’.
What Is Big T and Little T?
At this point, you may be thinking, what does that even mean, ‘big T’ and ‘little T’? Before expanding on the differences, it is essential to provide a basis for how one might define trauma. To define trauma, it’s also important to first acknowledge that we all have stressful lives. In fact, navigating stress is a part of our everyday human experience. However, what separates trauma from stress is that with stress, once the event is over, working through it with regulation, coping strategies and social support enables us to move past it psychologically and emotionally.
The Persistent Nature of Trauma
Where trauma differs, is despite the event being over, you continue to relive it with impacts to the body, mind, and your emotions. Van Der Kolk (2015) outlines that trauma is not just the event but is also defined as the ‘response’ that remains stuck long after the event/s has passed. Trauma results in feeling hyper-alert and on the constant lookout for danger, irritability and emotional dysregulation, sleep disturbances, difficulty with concentrating and recalling memory. Symptoms can often be debilitating, impacting us in a range of different ways such as increased anxiety, low mood, mistrust for others, isolation and withdrawal from others, coping with substances and low self-esteem.
Big T vs. Little T Trauma
Big T often presents to the therapy room as the potential or formal diagnosis of PTSD due to the overt and catastrophic nature of the events that define Big T, whilst little T can often remain more covert in nature with clients often unaware of the insidious impact of little T events and their experiences.
Whilst this form of trauma may not be considered life-threatening in nature, impacts associated with Little T can still impact the body, mind and nervous system much like the impact of Big T. Little T events are considered of a personal nature, potentially involving infidelity, being bullied, unexpected loss of employment, and feeling unloved or unlikeable as a child.
The Need for Connection
It’s important to note that as human beings, we are social creatures and a need to feel a sense of connection and belonging is essential to our survival and overall well-being.
Whichever way trauma shows up, often the emotional turmoil is both intense and challenging to navigate. For many trauma survivors, negative core beliefs pertaining to lack of self-worth become pervasive and keep clients stuck in a cycle of avoidance, fear, excessive worry, shame, anxiety and hypervigilance. Sometimes these negative core beliefs may sound like ‘I am bad’, ‘I am not worthy of love’, ‘I am unworthy’, or ‘there is something wrong with me’, to name a few.
These negative core beliefs can act as a method of defence to try and prevent anything negative from happening to us in the future. However, this kind of armour gets heavy and often impacts our lives in ways that hold us back. There are physical ways in which trauma-based responses show up for people, which are known as fight, flight, freeze and fawn responses.
Moving Towards Healing
The good news is trauma healing is both possible and an attainable goal to work towards. It is highly recommended that if this article has resonated with you, explore a therapist who may be a good fit for you to work through this in an environment where you feel safe and supported. However, if either you or someone you know is struggling with trauma, there are also a number of practical strategies that can support with symptoms of trauma dysregulation which can support you to move through challenges as they arise. Check out the list of resources below to try.
Van der Kolk, B. A. (2015). The body keeps the score: brain, mind, and body in the healing of trauma. New York, New York, Penguin Books.
Practical self-care for Trauma
- Breathwork: to support regulating the nervous system.
- Mindfulness, grounding, and meditation
- Connecting with positive and safe relationships in your network.
- Journalling and processing thoughts and feelings.
- Moving the body and engaging in activities that promote physical health and well-being.
- Create a self-care plan that connects you to activities that bring you joy.
- Avoid engaging in substances to regulate your emotions and nervous system.
